


In My Heart

by alliancedogtags



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Bonfires, First Kiss, IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE AND APPRECIATE PRESTON, M/M, Multi, Suicidal Thoughts, kinda? it's just his canon dialogue, no editing bc i live life on the wild side, preston is sunshine in human form, what's better than this? just folks in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-07 12:36:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15908403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alliancedogtags/pseuds/alliancedogtags
Summary: there's room in Avery's heart for two. watching Preston in front of the fire, he knows that, and he knows that nora would love him too.(suicidal thoughts mention - just his canon romance dialogue,  nothing more)





	In My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I MISS MY BOY  
> the mention of suicidal thoughts is just the dialogue that he actually says in game!  
> also idk why it neber puts my paragraph spaces in my bad  
> they're at my red rocket setup (i know it's ellie's but i built one for avery too) -  
> http://chronicpainhawke.tumblr.com/post/142778869044/trying-to-find-my-companions-at-sanctuary-was#notes

Despite all of the bravado and “party all night” that had been foretold before the planned bonfire, the last two awake were Preston and Avery.  
Surprising, really. Better yet, it was only midnight, and a few of the others had turned in, aside from the two asleep in a pile in front of the campfire. Piper lay with her head on Cait’s thigh and her cap pulled off and placed on top of her face, Cait dozing off with her head on her pack. Hancock had called in early, actually, stumbling in towards bed - this was less of a surprise, though, since he’d gone down to Quincy and back with Avery the day before. Nick and Codsworth had turned in early as well. That one, more believable. Deacon was elsewhere, busy with who-knows-what. (had anyone ever really seen him sleep?) The others had scattered long ago, all with their own excuses, but all definitely off to bed.  
In front of Preston and Avery the bonfire snapped and spit, sending sparks into the dark skies above them, soon blending into nothing but the vast expanse of stars far above them. Avery lay on his back with his feet towards the fire, an arm under his head to keep it from the cement and his other hand on his stomach. Preston lay beside him, finally in casuals, hat off to the side and elbow brushing against Avery’s side, both things leaving the survivor’s heart racing in his chest.  
All night he’d thought about nothing but Preston, the way the fire danced golden on Preston’s face, the curve of his smile when telling a story, the determined look on his face when the fire had gone out and he and Curie had worked together to get it burning again. Small things, really. Maybe it was radiation (but he’d had that cured) or a lack of sleep (even though he’d been getting seven hours a night), but Preston had been the main thing on his mind lately.  
Avery hadn’t felt much since Nora, not at all. No flirtatious laugh in Goodneighbor or gentle hand bump in Diamond City could change his mind, nobody worth joining the image of his late wife in his heart, nobody even close.  
Preston was so caring, though. So gentle and kind, always wanting to do what was right for the little people of the Commonwealth, genuine sunshine in human form. Where the Commonwealth found him, he was unsure. Something had brought him here.  
When he talked about Nora, he did it with the utmost care and sympathy. Gentle questions. Where had they met? What had she done? Also, what was a lawyer?  
When Avery paid respects to her, Preston had asked to join. Had found him an old ceramic base from one of the houses to put flowers in. (Sad as those flowers looked, the meaning behind meant more.)  
Maybe his heart was open to loving again, after all. In the early summer night, with a breeze that ruffled his hair and the sigh that escaped Preston, the snap of the bonfire at their feet, Avery believed that maybe there was a reason that he’d found Preston and the survivors in the museum that day. For no better ray of sunlight could there have been in the world.  
Avery turned his head to watch Preston for a moment, the way that the man’s eyes searched the skies, glimpsing the stars that he could through the thin cloud of smoke from the fire. He looked at peace; eyes soft, a thoughtful look on his face, chest rising and falling with each breath and an arm laying over his ribcage. The radio they had brought out hummed in the background, Diamond City radio fitting with the crickets in the background. There, he looked happy.  
There was plenty of room in Avery’s heart to love him.  
Preston caught him looking, turning his head with a smile so softly shadowed and lit by the fire. “What?”  
It felt like school again. Awkward fumbling. He wanted to look away, but this time he didn’t, instead thumbing at his wedding band absently. “Nothing.”  
“What’s on your mind, Avery?” Preston asked, rolling to his side and sitting up on an elbow, the line of his body smooth in that teeshirt and jeans he’d worn to the bonfire. The view made his breath catch.  
“You,” Avery found himself murmuring, much too late to stop it. “Nevermind. What are you thinking about? You looked deep in thought.”  
“You too, actually.” Preston chuckled, catching Avery’s cover up and yet going along with it instead of prying. That always worked best. Then, his face turned serious, looking past the fire to make sure that Cait and Piper were still both asleep. “I’ve been thinking back lately about how it was when we first met. It was the lowest point of my life. I mean… all my friends were dead. Everything I believed in turned out to be a lie.”  
“Because of the few who mistreated it,” Avery started, but Preston lifted a hand to stop him.  
“When we were trapped in that room in Concord, I knew how high the chances were that we were going to die.” Preston’s eyes turned instead to the fire, that same thoughtful look crossing his face again. “Thing was, I was actually okay with that. I was ready to die. It’s what I felt I deserved. It was what I wanted.”  
“Preston,” Avery started, pausing a moment. “I never realized you had lost hope like that.”  
“I had to be brave. Those survivors, they were still counting on me. That’s the only reason that I kept fighting.” Preston gestured vaguely in the direction of Sanctuary, before turning his attention back to Avery. “My point is… You saved my life that day. In more ways that one, Avery. You made me want to keep living. Made me feel again like there were reasons to keep going. That probably sounds very sappy, but it’s true.  
“If we hadn’t met, or if you’d killed those raiders and had just taken off… I don’t know if I would still be around.” For a moment, Preston looked lost. Avery ached so badly to reach out and take his hand. “I think I would’ve found some way to end it. Some other thing to die for.”  
They sat in silence for a moment, processing what had been said. For a few breaths, there was nothing but the sound of crickets, fire, and tunes playing from the radio. Instead of answering, Avery gave into the urge and reached out to take Preston’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. Preston squeezed back.  
“I just wanted you to know what our friendship has meant to me,” Preston murmured, swiping his thumb across the scarred back of Avery’s hand.  
Another moment of silence passed between them, Avery’s heart racing as Preston’s gaze dropped to their hands.  
It all meant so much, so much, for Preston to open up like this. He’d wondered about the things that had haunted Preston since his days in Quincy. Had seen it in tired eyes when he’d found Preston patrolling Sanctuary in the middle of the night. Had watched it in restless hands as Preston performed maintenance on his gun in times of peace, sitting in the chair in Avery’s room while they talked.  
Preston found him a saving grace. Avery had to admit that he’d felt the same when he had met Preston that day in Concord.  
“Have you ever… Thought about us being more than friends?” When Preston looked up, Avery was watching him. The surprise was nearly palpable.  
“Have I ever? You mean you’ve…” There was that sunshine in his eyes again, despite the shock and the quickly forming flustered look. He found it endearing. “Hold on. You caught me off guard. Let me start over.”  
Avery couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him, giving Preston’s hand another squeeze. “Take your time. We have all night.”  
“If you’re asking me if I have ever thought about you romantically, the short answer is yes.” The corner of Preston’s lips turned up in a small smile, though it threatened to break into a full grin. He sat up a little more on his elbow. “I never thought you’d feel the same way about me. I mean… I know Nora’s gone, but you’re still so in love with her. I didn’t think you were ready to move on.”  
“There’s room in my heart for both of you,” Avery replied. To add to the gesture, he tugged on Preston’s hand, laying it on his chest and over his heart. “I don’t have to stop loving her to love you, too.”  
“That’s - wow. Wow. That’s fantastic,” Preston murmured, leaving him on the end of a breath. The grin from earlier returned full force, fingers curling just slightly in the front of Avery’s shirt. Just looking at that smile left Avery’s feelings all in a jumble. “We don’t have to rush anything. It just means the world to me that you feel the same way.”  
“Even if it took me a bit to realize. I’m glad you opened up to me tonight.” Avery lay his hand over the back of Preston’s on his chest, letting out a soft sigh. His eyes traveled up to the sky again, watching the flicker of the stars far above them. Funny how he’d once taken moments like this for granted.  
Now, he didn’t. He took in every detail. Took in the stars, took in the snap and crackle of the fire. Enjoyed the warm weight of Preston’s hand still on his chest, fingers tracing over a callus on his knuckle absentmindedly. Felt the warm breeze ghosting over his skin and through his hair. The solid earth beneath him, still laying on his back. He felt free. Felt a warm love in his heart.  
Nora would’ve liked Preston, he thought.  
When his gaze lifted to Preston’s face, he found him smiling. “Can I kiss you?”  
“Been waiting for you to ask.”  
“I’m terribly predictable.”  
“The answer is yes.”  
It felt perfect, Preston leaning over him, Avery lifting his hand from the one on his chest to rest on the back of his neck. He found himself sighing into the first contact of their lips, eyes slipping shut, enjoying the warmth that he felt from the first kiss. Preston was careful, cautious, hand lifting from Avery’s chest to cradle his face. When he pulled back from the brief contact, Avery tugged him in closer with the hand on the back of his neck, pulling him down for another kiss. This one lingered, the press of Preston’s lips against his sweet and the warmth of the hand on his face leaving his heart fluttering, toes curling in his boots. Lots of other sappy things. He could feel the curve of Preston’s smile when he kissed him.  
At the sound of a clearing throat they parted, though none too fast, hands lingering. Both looked past the fire at Cait, who looked like she had just woken up, but her grin was mischievous.  
“Wake up, Piper,” she said, shaking her just slightly and leaving the reporter grumbling as she pulled her newscap off her face and squinted over at them when Cait pointed. “I think you owe me twenty caps.”  
“How are you so good at predicting this?” Piper asked, before sighing dramatically and sitting up to pull the caps from the pocket of her jacket where it lay over her back. “You’ll have to tell Hancock and Nick, too. You and Nick need to split this.”  
“Just throwing it out there, guys, but you’re ridiculous.” Avery sat up on his elbows, Preston’s hand dropping to rest on his chest again. “Wait. You’re telling me that Nick bet we’d get together?”  
“It was obvious,” Cait replied with a laugh, taking the caps when Piper dropped them into her hand. “Hancock bet a hunny that you two wouldn’t, too.”  
Preston finally spoke up. “Of all the people, I can’t believe that Piper and Hancock really didn’t have our backs on this one.”


End file.
